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The Good Thing About My Kids :: 15th March 2004

They drive me bananas when I have a dateline to catch. They make me scream my lungs out when I am trying to follow a Wah-Lai-Toi series on TV. Jed would be trying to climb Mount Mommy's Head...and Josh is testing my eardrums out.

That's the usual thing that happens at home that makes me think that maybe I should just elope....I haven't decided with whom...but I want a romantic holiday somewhere, under the sun or above in the clouds...it doesn't REALLY matter. Just somewhere...else.

When my mom said some countless years ago, "You think it's easy ah? Raising 3 kids, washing, cleaning, mopping, sweeping, cooking, bathing, feeding...etc. You think this life is easy ah?". As a youngster, I just shrugged and pretended not to hear. Inside, I was thinking, "Damn! What could be so hard about all that? Try doing all these homework and having to go to school?". Duh?

Now, I know. Now, I know, mom. And personally, not only do I salute you as a mother, wife and person, I think you are SUPERWOMAN!

It's no surprise, that this thought came to me when I was being hassled my 2 boys. They're ALWAYS...and how do I say it so that it reflects the magnitude of the word? ALLLLLLWWWWAAAAAAYYYYYAAAAAAAA, they are always up to something. Joshua always wants an ice-cream, Jared always want to breastfeed, Joshua always refuse to go and take his shower, Jared is always throwing something into the makeshift pond in the living room...they're ALWAYS doing something.

Then again, come to think about, what do you expect human beings to do? Not do anything at all and just be contented?

But I keep thinking about all those naughty things that they do sometimes and fret about them day in and day out that I miss out on spotting the good things that they do. It's so natural for us to complain about things that we tend to forget to remember the good things. Isn't it so convenient?

I don't know what I did right...or wrong but Joshua is, if you've read my previous articles, the more cautious and sensitive one of the two kids of mine. When he's watching TV, you can sit there and watch HIS FACE cause he would be animating everything on TV through his actions. If the main character was fighting, you can see this angry expression on his face. If the main character was being bullied on TV, you can see that tears are welling up in his eyes. He's just so senstive that I am wondering if this is the answer to my prayer for a miraculous girl.

And he's frightful of me when I am angry. I have to admit, I am not a person to contend with when I am mad cause when I am mad, I am RAVING MAD. No in between. When I am calm, I can play around and fool and kid around with him. But when I am angry, there's no half-half mad or half-half calm. It's either I am calm or I am mad. Call me extreme but Joshua knows this. And he is fearful of me.

So, everytime he does something wrong, like wets his bed, he would look at my facial expression for signs of my temperament. And if I keep my face really straight, he would be sitting there motionless trying hard to read my face. It's really cute! When I do that, most times I just burst into a throttle or laughter that totally consumes me cause he's just too funny!

Joshua is also very obedient when it comes to his homework. He's only 4 years old and he's got so much homework to do? What did I know when I was 4 years old? Nothing, absolutely NOTHING.

But he's got school work, KUMON work and I personally give him English homework as well. I would have expected him to fight us off each time we drag the homework bag out but he doesn't. We ask him, "Can we do homework now?" and he would reluctantly drag his butt over to the table, sits himself down, mentally prep himself for senseless counting and repetitive writing. Then you can see that his face lights up, "Do homework and then I get sticker? Can I have Pokemon sticker?"

Last night, he was busy playing with his new car toy that daddy bought for him. It was a cheap and yet cool toy. Cheap for the parents, and cool for the kids. Anyway, it was time to go for his KUMON class and kakak told him that it was time for class and he shook his head. I came over and whispered into his ears, "If you go KUMON, mommy will get you chocolate ice-cream, how about that?" And as usual, a lightbulb went off in his head and he quickly wore his clothes and slippers, getting all revved up for class.

Jed, on the other hand, is learning how to throw things, and hit others over the head. If you step on his toes or anything, you'd better cover your head cause he would silently creep up behind you and deliver a knock out to the back of your skull! We discourage this by sometimes scolding him about it, telling him that it hurts others. Most times, I find myself losing myself in my reprimanding, so much so that I deliver a slight smack to his hands to emphasize my point.

He's also learning how to say 'no' rather quickly. You eaten your lunch? No. You want to go kai-kai? No. You want nen-nen (milk)? No. You want to kiss me? No. The answer to every question is a 'no' and we sometimes repeat after him to make him laugh cause he can sound like parrot sometimes with his very shrill and baby-like voice. (Joshua has a raspier and Rod-Stewart rock-singer type voice, you see).

But with Jed, it's hard to be angry with him cause he is so sweet all the time. Even if he's angry, he's cute-angry. He likes to frown and then turn it into a big wide smile shouting "Ah-Ha!" and then back to a frown and then Ah-Ha again! This is a game to him and we play this quite often with him cause he's absolutely adorable when he's frowning.

The greatest thing with Jed is that he knows how to 'read faces', as in he's tactful for a kid his age. I mean, imagine a toddler looking at your face to see if you're pleased with him or not before sitting on your lap. I don't mean to say that I am such a HITLER that my kids are fearful of me but this habit is natural to Jed. HE DOES THIS WITH EVERYONE ELSE!

My parents have not played big roles in the lives of my kids. I don't blame them. Seriously don't because at old age, you wouldn't want to be boggled down with the responsibility of having to take care of grandkids and all that, right? And honestly, I don't relish the idea of shoving my kids into my parents lap all the time too.

But the insignificant impact my parents have my children showed this weekend when we went over to my parents place for dinner. Jed was so fearful of my dad that he would pat his chest and say "Scared, Kong-Kong" everytime we ask him to go near my dad. I feel embarassed that Jed, who is normally very fun-loving, is not more social.

Thankfully, my dad is really understanding about Jed's stance and respected Jed's decision to stay away. Although my dad would try to entice him over with something sweet or try to con him to sit on his lap or something. Hahahaa! Didn't work, though.

:: Marsha ::